Freda Mooncotch member for 1 year 24 weeks Send a message

I want to extend my apologies as it may appear that I have abandoned the site since late last week. One of the many hats I wear, from cleaning toilets to washing the dishes, is to ensure that we are marketing this community, monetizing it, and getting it constantly exposed to the right editors, to the right people and to make sure we grow.

This past week, was nothing short of exhausting. Christine and I are learning a multitude of job roles from taking good video's, to editing our video's, which we finally threw in the towel and found a great guy named John to handle that for us, to learning how to use photo shop, use applications that we can't spell or say, let alone work and throw two parties. It has been overwhelming to say the very least.

I have to admit, it was a lot of fun making the video's, we just never really understood how much effort it was going to take getting the video's from the camera to the PC to the editing software, all in hopes of bringing you a two minute video, instead of a two hour video and that it didn't make you throw up after watching because we couldn't keep the camera still. To say that we have been busy would be an understatement.

This got me to thinking. How many other women are out there that are waking up on the right side of the entrepreneuerial bed today? I would venture to say a lot. More and more women are being true to themselves and following their passions. I for one would encourage every woman, or man for that matter, who has a dream of being self-employed to take that leap, but this past week made me stop atleast five times and ask myself the question, "What the hell were you thinking?" It isn't easy going into business for yourself. It is a huge risk with no guaranteed rewards or returns. If you fail, in many cases you loose the whole nest egg that took you ten years to make.

That being said, I knew NOTHING about the internet, much less websites or website developement, coding, html, php, open source CMS, or for that matter about social networking communities, or the difference between magazine style format verses user generated content. I knew nothing about server hosting or advertising or anything else you can think of that goes along with running a very complex business. I didn't open up a two person shop with a sign that says open and closed M-F, 9 to 5pm (although, right now I wish I had) we are open 24/7. We never go to sleep, we never shut down, we are hear around the clock making sure it all runs smoothly and with so much to do and so little time.

This past week, I just mentally crashed. Checked out.

In an effort to regain my sanity, I took the entire weekend off. I couldn't fit another piece of information in my brain if I wanted to. So, I decided to shut me down. One big mistake that business people make, from small businesses to large corporations, is to burn out their people. I know that when I am exhausted, my creativity is worthless. My mind is closed to ideas, to any creative thoughts and therefor I am no good to myself or my business.

It is important, especially for small business owners because they wear so many hats, to take time to shut your brain off regularly. I figured you guys could manage without me for a while and you did.

I think it is especially important to spend time with your family and not let work be the topic of conversation. I spent the majority of my weekend with my family. On Friday night, my mom, my son and I went to a little Italian place and listened to my son tell us about his childhood and all of his memories, we were laughing hysterically. He has some great memories that one day would make a great comedy show. We did some really goofy things and he has such a fantastic sense of humor. He reminded me of Bill Cosby talking about his mother. I hope he never becomes a comedian. We can laugh now. He especially has some fond memories of my father chasing him around the house when he was just a little guy and they played cowboys, or shoot 'em up, and they had cap guns. When Zach would shoot my dad, my dad would fall down and play dead and Zach would jump on him and they would wrestle. That kid was not happy unless he was being chased by someone! My mother and I were teared up. We forget those things.

I asked my son a question about something and he sarcastically said, "Well you would know if you were around." Of course I hit him, and he giggled. I know he is right. I am busy, but in the same breath, that kid is proud of his momma. He tells me often how much I inspire him and what he wants to do when he goes to college. He is always thinking about what business he is going to start or where he wants to work.

As most people in business, I have a tendency not to enjoy the "process" and want immediate results, causing me to try and move the process along much faster than it will go. I get all caught up in work and I forget why I am doing it all in the first place.

My mother constantly reminds me, "Look at where you have come from and how far you are." It is true. It has only been a total six months and I am on my second website. We are almost complete with phase two. In just a short frame of time, I have jumped through hurdles, made some really bad decisions followed by some really good ones and am so much smarter than I was just six short months ago. Everything I didn't in pharagraph two, is like a second language to me now. That is progress. My biggest problem is to set my eyes on the end result and I forget to measure my progress along the way, always holding myself to my "ideal" website. That is insanity. As my mom pointed out to me, "It is hard to feel good about your accomplishments or even notice them when you are always focused on the end result and not measuring from where you are coming and not where you are going."

It is so simple that it is any wonder how I could let such a thought slip my mind. I needed to take that time to remember and access where I was just six months ago. I once heard a very wise man say, "Many people spend their lives creating wealth, only to spend their wealth recovering their health."

If you are a woman who is self-employed and has taken that leap into building your dream - Kudos for you, I will be the first to say, "It is fricken hard!!! I understand. Hang in there, don't give up, don't let go of your dream, but don't get burned out.

If you are a woman who is thinking about taking that leap of faith into unchartered territory, may I share these simple words with you - DO YOUR HOMEWORK! All kidding aside, working for yourself can be very rewarding, but what everyone forgets to tell you about is all the blood, sweat, and tears that go along with it in the beginning. Most of the time we are presented with the pretty endings in magazines and on TV shows, especially when women are featured. Most TV and print media glamorize women in business taking women of fortune 500 companies and creating "Cinderella" stories without embellishing on the hardknocks, the lessons, the tears and sacrifice. They often present the pretty, packaged version to us. Know that it takes work to build a dream. It takes time and sacrifice. It also brings out issues in many other areas of your life too: time with family, time with spouse, time with yourself, time with friends and time in general.

Let this be your community where you share your struggles, your challenges, your accomplishments so we can support you and learn from you too. I will be the first to admit, I have made trillions of mistakes in this new venture, I will probably make even more. Good news is, I my judgement is getting better and my learning curve is getting smaller. I hope to write about many of my adventures in business and share them over the next several weeks.

I leave you with these two lessons: ALWAYS TRUST YOUR GUT, and when you are really stressed out, you won't make good decisions, everything will look like a nail and you will only want to use a hammer.