I have a baby but I don’t know whose it is!

anjewoodruffe member for 28 weeks 10 hours Send a message

At the beginning of the summer, I decided that I wanted to plant some flowers so I went to Kmart to the plant section and looked at all the seed packets. Although I was very tempted to pick up a flowering plant and create amazing hyperbole's about how I grew it, I decided to do it the hard way and get some green thumb genes moving.
Naturally, as I purchased the seeds I didn’t actually READ the potentially pertinent information about how to grow and nurture these seeds. I purchased my seeds based on the pretty flowered pictures on the outside while fantasizing about how beautiful they will look on my windowsill. I envisioned it and it was as good as real.

So...I set off to the house with my top soil and 3 plant pots and well … I figured, why plant 3 pots when I can do just one and see what happens. My fantasy was the one big pot overflowing with pretty flowers. That being said, Anje Anj, poured the seeds from 6 or 7 little packets of Kmart’s finest all into one flower pot.

In about 7 days I saw some action. I saw spouts and I got truly excited so I became very dedicated at my watering schedule, I even fingered the soil to test the wetness and I became quite adept at rotating the pot to ensure adequate sunlight.

Yesterday, I was looking at my pot which now has lots of healthy green things growing out of it. I have yet to see one actual flower but I am hopeful since there are other new seedlings bursting and rising out of the soil. I found a packet of Forget me Not seeds and I threw them in the same pot. All I wanted all summer was to see one flower grow out of a plant pot and here we are, two weeks to the end of summer and I have tremendously healthy bush (which is what it looks like) growing out of the pot and I am wondering – where the hell are my flowers? The packets had pictures of flowers and I am yet to see one pretty petal in my window sill.

Of course, the other issue is that I sorta randomly selected these seeds and threw them all in the pot and since I cannot identify one from another, I wonder, if and when they do sprout what the hell they are! I may have given birth to decuplets and I don’t know who they belong to! Who is my flower daddy?

Comments

Login or register to post a comment

I seriously need to get

I seriously need to get laid. All I saw in this blog was, "I fingered...to see if it was wet...I have a tremendously healthy bush." Jimmeny Crickets Anj! You're killing me!!!

"I paint my own reality." -Frida Kahlo

Buzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Girl - you need a toy! A pocket rocket. An advanced workout. Blow up Johnny. Mud wrestling - something. Sounds like you got some build up that is begging to come out...

Be free and Buzzzzzzzz like me.

xoxo Anje
"I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle, but if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best" -
Marilyn Monroe

Haha! Yeah, I've been there,

Haha! Yeah, I've been there, done that, and I've come to the realization that even though they get the job done, I am not really into toys. I don't know why. I mean, don't get me wrong, I like self pleasure, but not when it's a result of a plastic, penis shaped buzzer.

Nothing beats the real thing Eye-wink

"I paint my own reality." -Frida Kahlo

True but..

The real thing is good on good days- toys are always good. I used to say I wasn't into it but I sleep better for a number of reasons:it's nice not to have to be concerned about STD's, pregnancy, morning breath, what they want for breakfast, if they snore, how much room they will be taking up on your bed, leaving your toilet seat up, wetting the bathroom floor after their shower...

xoxo Anje
"I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle, but if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best" -
Marilyn Monroe