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Mom Power…Continued.

Sometimes I sit quietly in my den, my eyes almost closed in order to better gather and evaluate my thoughts as I continuously feed that addictive feeling of being in touch with myself. Few things have been constant in my life, my own company being one of them. My eyes burn as I float through my years of youthful memories and young adult adventures, plucking randomly to relive and taste, even for just a moment. I curl up my lips as I recognize I've logged almost 10 years as a mother. My heart suddenly feels massive and present, pumping a bit slower so I can hear my inner-voice between beats. Damn, I hear nothing but traffic...mind traffic...my traffic. As busy as any NYC street corner. When I step into my mind, I desire solitude. The kind of solitude you find in the Green Mountains of Vermont. With so much weighing on my mind, it's no wonder I'm needing to erect a private office with appointment only status. This "office" needs little more than a floor cushion and an endless view...there are no land-lines or cell phones, computers, door-bells, dogs, neighbors, UPS dudes (or dudettes), mixed-colored laundry piles, dishes-clean or dirty, arts and crafts, sippy-cup spills, crushed Cheerios on the floor and so on. A single shelf that goes on forever lets books of all shapes and sizes rest upon it. My favorites include The Dictionary, The Growing Tree and The Velveteen Rabbit. A good size stack of white paper and two sharpened pencils with fat erasures on-call. Yes! With a little focus I have shoved aside the mind traffic and settled into my private space...a space I own, not rent. A space that eagerly receives me. A space I can do no wrong in. All thoughts, perspectives, opinions, insights and instincts are welcome. This space prompts me to reflect and grow, reflect and grow, reflect and grow. I typically depart from this space fuller and happier…it must be from my ability to truly befriend myself. Even if I get my hands around nothing, I know I've made progress because I'm narrowing in with each consecutive visit.