Back in August when everything in my world came crashing down around me, it took a lot of positive thinking and amazing encouragement from unlikely sources to get me through the thick of the storm. A very good friend of mine and attorney sent me an email about a interview given by Paul Dejoria about John Paul Mitchell and his struggle from homelessness to billionaire twice over! He elaborated on John Paul's personal struggle to keep his vision alive and his unwavering faith to the point of experiencing homelessness with his two year old son. He was committed and failure was not an option for him. I can only imagine the things that the people in his life said to him during this tough time. Ultimately, his struggle paid off and he created a very lucrative business and the ever popular John Paul Mitchell hair salons and products. He also owns The Patron Tequila Company too.

This advice and encouragement came to me in my darkest hour and I am very grateful for it. Here are seven rules to live by when you are pursuing your dreams:

1.) NEVER, NEVER GIVE UP; 2.) ALWAYS have faith; 3.) Believe in your ability to succeed DESPITE what others may say - in other words, define yourself, don't let others define you; 4.) Constantly self-analyze and learn from your mistakes; 5.) Rely on other people whose strengths are your weaknesses; 6.) Take whatever cash you can in the present moment when it is available to you even if it comes at a price - lowering your margin if you are an established company (100% of a company worth nothing, means owning nothing); and lastly 7.) Treat everyone you encounter the way you would want to be treated.

I had many of my "friends" tell me things that were very painful. You really find out who your real friends are when you go through your toughest trials. You also find out who you really are when you are flat on your back. One of my "friends" in a drunken stupor, decided to tell me what he and his wife really thought about me (I truly enjoyed and cared about this couple). Among other things, he told me that the best thing that could happen to me is that I fall flat on my face, lose all my money and have to look at my life and do something with it. I didn't realize I was doing "nothing" with my life, I didn't realize how closely they were watching my check book and I didn't realize how unhappy and jealous both of them really were. Coming from someone who can't stay in a marriage very long, I thought that was the pot calling the kettle black.

At first it hurt, but I got over it really quick. But, if I was such a failure and bad friend, what did that say about their choice of people who they hang out with? My gosh, does that really make sense? It didn't take me more than a few minutes to realize they were not my friends, something my gut had been screaming at me for weeks. This past year has really taught me NOT to ignore my initial gut feeling when I meet people. It has never been incorrect thus far and had I listened to it in the first place, I would have completely avoided people like this and saved myself a lot of unnecessary frustration. It was a life changing moment for me.

After that, I started to take a hard look at many of my friendships and realized most were very shallow and built on grains of sand, there was very little substance to them. I also realized WHO my dearest friends were and I treasure them so much more than ever before. I value them in such deep ways. The older you get the more you realize how important having good friends in your life really is. I realized just how unhappy many people are and how they project their unhappiness on you and in the "advice" they give to you. It is so easy to hold on to all the shit that people dole out to us, but, it is a gift to hold on to and absorb the beautiful, meaningful things others say to us. I hung this little note that my attorney sent me and many others like that in plain sight so I could focus on the positive things God was trying to tell me through this difficult time.

I can tell you, I am on the other side of the storm and I AM NOT giving up. I have come out stronger, wiser, and clearer in my thinking than ever before. I realized my mistakes, I realized my lessons and I am feeling like a newer, stronger person in spite of all the pain. I feel like I have so much more to offer people now that I have been through this, and guess what - I am still alive!

So, if you are struggling with a personal, professional, financial issue or whatever, do as I did- surround yourself with people who truly care about you. People who will encourage you, give you faith and inspire you. Being down tends to bring out all the vultures who like to kick you, so it is important to stay positive and get around people you trust. Hold on to their encouragement and leave the shit at the door.